Re-evaluating my relationship with my phone

I’ve always thought about how I use my phone. Back during the COVID years, I rooted my phone and de-googled it. I made my own server to host media and music. Now that I have more time to think, I’ve come to realize my ultimate goal has been to better my relationship with technology, especially my phone. I don’t enjoy that my life is behind a phone or computer. I don’t like that in any moment of boredom, I itch to grab my phone and soothe myself. With a lot more free time on my hands, I’m now making how I interact with technology a priority.

For about last 6 months, I always thought the solution to this was to switch to a dumbphone. By removing the main source of the urge, the hope would be that over time I could rewire my brain into not having the urge to scroll in the first place. My plan was to pick up a dumbphone that can call, text and hotspot, then keep my iPhone as a secondary device incase I needed any smart capabilities. The iPhone would be off 99% of the time, and when I need to check a direction or get a ticket or scan a QR code, I’d turn it on to do the task required and turn it off again. I already keep a side bag with me that use to carry a camera and my MP3 player so it’s not that hard to carry a second phone in there too. My one hang up with this is that I want to avoid the consumerist trap of getting more devices. I was talking with my girlfriend and she mentioned that instead of jumping cold turkey, maybe to try every possibility I have with my smartphone first. I’ve already got an app limiting app and deleted the distracting apps, but she brought up the idea of finding alternative strategies to replace the habit of checking my phone. So keep the smartphone, but when I have the urge to grab it, reflect on why I want to grab it first. Ask myself, “do I really need to use it? Or is there an alternative I can use instead. Overtime, the brain will hopefully associate the urge with the new habit instead.

I am a little skeptical to be honest, it’s not like we tell alcoholics or drug addicts to keep their vices in their pockets and journal when they have an urge instead. But also, I don’t think my phone addiction any where as extreme as an alcoholics need to drink alcohol. Therefore, I will give it a chance. Worst come to worst, I can confidently say I’ve tried almost every option before trying to buy a new device.

These are habits I want to commit to try to mend my relationship with my phone:

1. Limit the reasons to use my phone - I’d like to keep my phone primarily as a communication device, so I’ve kept calling, texting, discord (with only servers I actively communicate in), and WhatsApp. I have secondary uses for my phone (digital wallet, navigation/public transit/restaurant points apps), so those apps are staying as well. Aside from those, anything distracting is removed from my phone. I use ScreenZen to block social media websites so I can’t access them from my browser. I will allow myself to check my email from the browser incase I need to grab a ticket or something from it, but there’s so much friction to access it I only check it a handful of times in a day.

   I starting to believe if I need use my phone consume connect, most of the time it is the inappropriate time to use it. Do I really need to walk around video playing in my hand? If I want to watch a video I will use my tablet, carrying that is awkward so it forces me to keep it down. Otherwise, I’ll watch the video while I sit at my computer.

2. Limiting algorithmic feeds - I don’t hate technology, I hate algorithms. There’s a plethora of videos that explain the harmful effect that short form algorithmically fed content can have on cognitive ability, focus and memory (checkout this great video by howtown). I think the internet changed when companies realized they could feed content to the users instead of having the users look for the content themselves. So I’ve installed extensions on my browsers to block the infinite scroll on every social media app. My Youtube is a blank screen with just a search bar. Instead of using subscriptions, I’m using an RSS feed to track when my subscriptions post new videos. By limiting the feeds available to me, I hope to seek out the content I want to consume rather it being fed to me.

3. More analogue evenings - I don’t mean analogue in the social media sense, which equates analogue with mid-2000s technology. I mean truly screenless evenings. I can play music off my CDs, but no phones, no video games, no TV. This will require me to face my boredom and also find activities that I enjoy that don’t require a screen. Maybe I’ll go for a walk with my film camera, or read my book or write on a pen and notebook. The goal is to find enjoyment in activities that don’t rely on a screen. I think I will start with Mondays.

Let’s see how this goes, I will report back in a month or so with how this is going!